Welcome again!

Time for another edition of "The Fridge Door". People have asked why I called it that - well it's simple, anytime we receive a note or other rubbish of general interest it gets stuck behind a fridge magnet on the fridge door - consequently on the door you'll find notes about dentists appointments, recipes, telephone bills, pictures by the kids down the road and all manner of rubbish in no particular order. It sorta fits the concept of this! A load of rubbish with some interesting bits buried in there somewhere.

As usual - the news! (start serious and gradually degenerate into piffle)

Are you getting ripped off???

Domains

I've had a few calls now from various customers saying that they've had a phone call from some outfit calling themselves "The Internet Domain Registry" or some such similar name (it does seem to vary a bit). They call and tell you that someone wants to use your domain name and if you don't pay them £100 they'll sell it.

Well if you listen REALLY carefully that's not what they're saying - but boy does it sound like it!  If you hadn't already guessed it's a scam! What they've done is look up your existing domain name and see if all the variations have been registered - if not, you get the call....

The call is carefully worded to make you think you'll lose your domain if you don't pay them the money. Well you won't! What they are offering is another variation of your existing name, and they are overcharging you for it!

What they do isn't illegal or wrong (quite) it's a simple scare tactic to get you to part with your cash. So far as I can tell the charge they make is £100 for 2 years registration for any domain name. If you get a call from them and you are genuinely interested then let me know - I'll give you the same service (or better) for £50 for two years! Now can I say fairer than that?

News
 
New web sites

It's been a busy period just recently! Loads of new sites some of which are live and some we're still working on here are a sample:

  • Athlone Group - www.athlonegroup.com
    The Athlone Group builds, markets and delivers a high value portfolio of measurable start up, turnaround and business acceleration services which positively impact a client’s ability to achieve corporate objectives.
     
  • Skyguard Technologies - www.skyguardtechnologies.co.uk
    SkyMinder from Skyguard - providing safety and security for lone workers Personal safety of staff is a legal responsibility you can help rotect them, when alone and exposed to violence or accident, with SkyMinder from Skyguard Technologies.
     
  • BRM Line Marking - www.brm-linemarking.co.uk
    BRM Line Marking offers a range of road marking services including road and car park markings of all types.  BRM provides a high quality and cost effective service to clients, ranging from local authorities through to schools, contractors and private companies throughout the UK.
     
  • Iris Communications - www.iris-communications.co.uk
    Suppliers of Navaho CAT Appliances. The Navaho CAT range of appliances are a complete Internet management solution designed to control, monitor and protect access to the Internet and enable staff to work effectively.
     
  • Avatar Montenegro - www.avatar-montenegro.com
    Avatar International occupy a unique and privileged position in the overseas property market. With an impressive network of partners throughout Turkey, Bulgaria, Croatia, Brazil, Hungary and now Montenegro, they benefit from generations of local knowledge, so can help customers make the right choice.

Those are just a sample - there have been loads of updates to existing sites plus many new ones under development....

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Search Engines (OK, OK, I know I harp on about it!)

Serious bit! After the debacle of losing most of the independent search engines back in March and therefore Google and Overture now ruling the world search engine wise it's even more important to make sure your site is listed.

The rules are going to change again soon. At the moment there are effectively 3 search engines. Google, Overture and Teoma - one way or another these 3 between them power something like 90% of all the searches on the web. Come the end of this year or early next year this is gonna change. Microsoft (or more accurately MSN) are going to go independent and leave the Overture group where they currently are.

So what? I hear you say. Well rumour control has it that when the next release of Windoze happens the search function will be built into the operating system. So if Microsoft release the operating system and have their own search engine on the web it doesn't take too much effort to figure out which search engine they'll use for web searches. As most people will happily accept default values on system set up then it stands to reason that if you want your site to be found by people using Windoze (that's about 95% of all computers) then you'll need to be listed on the MSN search engine!

So how do you do that? - The obvious answer is to pay the horrendous charges demanded by Overture and hope you get carried across when Microsoft pull out. OK - as far as it goes that's pretty sound reasoning. However tests conducted by search engine optimisation companies in the USA (bless 'em) have shown that paying for listings in Overture actually makes your listing worse not better. So that method probably isn't the best way. I suspect the only way to gain the most listings and therefore be impossible to ignore is to make sure you are listed in as many search engines as possible and to make damn sure that you keep refreshing that listing.

WARNING - Sales pitch coming up!

So how do you achieve that wonderful state of affairs? Easy, keep registering your site with the search engines. But it's not so simple - all the search engines have different rules and they change them! You could do it manually but that's real hard work! You could hire a search engine optimisation company to do it for you. I know a few of you have tried that and I also know that no one has been satisfied with the results. Now there is an alternative!

I now have access to an automatic system which will register and re-register selected pages of your site with all the major search engines according to their rules so your listing is at very least maintained. It's not a perfect system but after 3 months of experiments the results are positive.

It costs £30 per month (or £300 per year) per site and makes sure your site gets as much exposure as possible - it doesn't make you number 1 in Google or claim to, but it will make sure you are at least in there. Remember it's possible you could drop out of a search engine and if you don't know you could be losing business without ever knowing about it....

Want to know more? Drop me an email or give me a call! Contact details are on the website..

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Disability Discrimination Act (DDA)

This'll keep you awake at night! In October the DDA comes fully into effect! Believe it or not it also applies to websites, what it means in effect is that your website must handle in a predictable manner when viewed by a disabled person. In practice people with visual impairments must still be able to use your website. There are other considerations but this is the biggest by far. There is little you can do for deaf people and physical handicaps are almost all covered by hardware - I doubt a wheelchair ramp would assist any website, even if I could figure out a way to fit it or a use for it!

Interestingly the Government have nearly 1,000 websites for various departments and individual causes. On a recent survey over 80% (806 to be precise) failed to meet even the most basic requirements of the DDA.. OOPs Tony!!

The easiest way to make sure your website complies with all the requirements is simply to have a second (text only) site linked in to your main website. This also has an additional benefit of adding extra pages and links to help boost your search engine listings. Also text only sites are far more search engine friendly anyway! It's also tons cheaper than a complete redesign!

Slugs & Snails &
Puppy Dog Tales...

For all those who know me well a quick update on Ruby our Guide Dog pup...

That's all gone sort of pear shaped! In the last month or so we've discovered that Ruby has DJD - or degenerative joint disorder, what this means is that she won't make it as a working dog. The workload of being a Guide Dog would simply be too much for her.

This is obviously a bit of a blow because she was doing REALLY well - she's a tremendous dog and certainly one of the best we've ever had (she's the 13th Guide Dog we've walked so I suppose we should have expected something!)

So what happens now? Simple! Guess who's just got another pet dog!!! Actually it's better than that - after so long discussions with Guide Dogs we're going to attempt a little experiment - Ruby is going to get some Guide Dog training and a harness and we hope to use her as an ambassador for Guide Dogs when we go off on our fund raising activities....

It's not always possible to get a real Guide Dog or puppy when we go visiting corporate clients to raise sponsorship or maybe they are too far away for a young puppy to travel so Ruby is going to be trained up as a sort of "example" Guide Dog.

After helping raise £100,000 in corporate sponsorship in the last year Ruby doesn't owe anybody anything but she is just so good...

The New Pup

Just to keep you informed we'll be getting our Guide Dog pup around mid-August time. Her name will be Bella and she's also a sponsored pup. (She hasn't actually been born yet - so everything may change in the coming weeks but those are the plans!) Bella will be a full sister of Ruby, her mum is Trudi who we also walked a few years ago and dad is Samson a huge great soppy thing of a German Shepherd. The very pregnant mum is doing well...

The Slugs and Snails

The battle between the slugs and snails goes exceedingly well - the Hostas are doing fine and have hardly been munched at all.

My secret weapon - Nematodes - or bugs to normal people. These are microscopic little beasties that kill slugs and snails in a totally natural way and are harmless to pets and plants and kids and everything.

I must admit I had serious doubts when I first heard of them (on Ebay of all places!) but now I am sold! If you think you have a slug problem click on Slippery Sid the slug below for the website!


It makes me MAD!!!
 

How come Sven-Göran Eriksson gets paid in the region of £4m per year.

Has it escaped everyone's notice that the last (and only) time England won a major title was in 1966!
40 odd years ago?

Please justify that salary!

Again answers written on a ten pound note please!


Update...
Email Marketing

Still talking to to Liasonline about email marketing - it really is a good system and can be made to work. The only trouble is we've been so busy since the last email we haven't had time to do much about it. The only thing I can definitely say is that it does work! The last "Fridge Door" was sent out on a Sunday to 70 odd clients and by Wednesday of that week I had 4 orders for new sites from existing customers!

If it works for me it can work for you.....

 
Recipe of the Month!

No recipe this month - I can do much better! Those of you who know me are aware that I like my grub! (Now there's an understatement if ever I heard one!) In my travels I have stumbled across a rather unique phenomenon - a company who REALLY do what they say!

If you happen across a store that stocks pies from "The Real Pie Company" then buy their entire stock! That is if you like pies and sausages rolls. These are drop dead gorgeous! Not like those flaky pastry covered heaps of brown coloured mush you get from Tesco's, ASDA, Sainsbury et al. but REAL MEAT PIES wiv meat in 'em. Seriously they are just like my mum used to make - and she could cook a pie!

They don't have a website (and yes I have written to them but no reply yet) but if you want to contact them and ask for your nearest stockist the address is:

The Real Pie Company
Unit 19-20
Imperial Business Centre
Rutherford Way
Crawley RH10 2RD
T: / F: 01293 550977

If you should happen to mention you know someone who could turn out a website to do justice to their pies...
 

Glossary
Some nice new terms you may wish to use in your business vocabulary to show how clever you are...
  • adminisphere:
    The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
     
  • assmosis:
    The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss. You will all be measured on this at some point in your career.
     
  • blamestorming:
    Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible. This one will be particularly valuable to those of you who have projects going right now.
     
  • chainsaw consultant:
    An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands.
     
  • clm:
    Short lingo for "career limiting move". Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while she is within earshot is a serious clm. (Related to clb, "career limiting behavior".)
     
  • dilberted:
    To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. For example, "I've been Dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week."
     
  • flight risk:
    Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon.
     
  • ohnosecond:
    That minuscule fraction of time it takes to realise that you've just made a big mistake.
     
  • percussive maintenance:
    The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it working again.
     
  • salmon day:
    The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to die in the end. We've had these before --- and will again.
     
  • seagull manager:
    A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, poops all over everything then leaves. Another word for consultant.
Before I forget!
Film Review

Here's a film for you! If you're over 40 and a fan of the old Hammer horror films of the early 70's then don't miss this:

Van Helsing

It's a parody of the old Hammer films with a touch of James Bond thrown it for good measure. You need a weird sense of humour but if you've got one this is the film for you!

Hampton Court

Once again the Hampton Court Flower Show looms and for the third year we're building a website to show the World of Water show garden taking shape.

This year's entry is Lazy Days designed and built by Pete Simms of LGS Ltd

See:
www.worldofwater.com/hc2004
www.worldofwater.com
www.lgsltd.com

Stargate SG-1

Stargate SG-1 season 7 has just ended with the team sort of finding the "Lost City of the Ancients"

www.stargate-sg1.com

Next month and as a real treat not only does Season 8 start but the new spin off Stargate Atlantis begins - OK so it's only being screened in USA for the moment but it'll get over here eventually and when it does please don't call - the phone will be switched off!!!

The bottom line:

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.

Relevant links: Nemasys RHS RNIB Liaiseonline GDBA Artography

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